Mandy\'s avatar

 I still have no idea if he was serious or just good at playing along, but that officer seemed genuinely apologetic that he couldn’t tase Fox! I’ll bet he just had no clue where to even start the paperwork necessary to legally tase a willing civilian…

Maybe Fox can follow up with the station later on.

Fox\'s avatar

I wanted the shirt

32 comments on “Teaser

  1. However, it is legal to buy a taser. I know because a Bible Study friend had one that they showed off. They said it doesn’t feel like much if you just tap someone, but it’s not wise to hold for more than a second or so.

    As my quick shopping search shows, they’re also pretty expensive, though legal to own and carry.

    1. You don’t typically “tap” someone with a taser. Tasers are a brand name LTL weapon that fire barbs which embed themselves into skin to deliver the current.
      You can remove the cartridge and are left with two prongs, which would make it operate like a stun-gun, but if you’ve spent several hundred on a TASER and are in a situation where you actually believe you need to use it, you’re not going to want to get close enough to be disarmed–you’re going to use the ranged advantage.
      The cartridges aren’t cheap, either. At about $30USD per shot, most won’t be willing to demonstrate them. They also make a mess, spitting out tons of confetti with the cartridge serial number on it.
      Civvie versions also don’t let you control the time of “The Ride”. It’s something like 20 or 30 seconds, which is designed to give you time to drop the TASER and run away.
      What you’re describing could be a TASER, but it sounds more like a stun gun. The latter is far less effective, and usually just piss off attackers.
      Not going to go into everything we learned in the class, but suffice it to say, the TASER is a superior product, only really defeated by poor aim or…well, PCP.

      1. This does a decent job displaying and explaining it

        The TASER works best across large muscles, and when the barbs are spaced further apart from one another, as this disrupts more electrical systems in the body. This is why they’re superior to stun guns which are only spaced centimeters apart, and just hurt.

        These are police officers which, in many departments, are either required, or highly recommended be tased prior to using the device. Mostly for legal purposes.

      2. It’s not fun, but a great story. Or I thought it would be anyway.

        Instead I wound up with potentially a better story, without the suffering.
        It was pretty clear the lieutenant intended to simply give us a hard time on the taser training day. He did not expect me to not only remember, but wish to go through with it.
        Having IA in the back on the same day was a convenient excuse, and I’ll give him props for coming up with it quickly.

      3. Electronic Control Devices / Conducted Electrical Weapons (Stun Guns) and TASERs are like self-adhesive bandages and Band-Aids. One is a generic class of object, the other is a specific branded variant.

        TASER stands for Thomas A Swift’s Electric Rifle, a comic book reference used to name the device after the weapon used by a comic book hero to immobilize his foes without serious harm or collateral damage. The original TASERs used a small gunpowder charge to propel the darts, and was classified a firearm by the brilliant administrators over at BATFE. Some time in the 80s an engineer helped the original inventor develop a self contained gas powered launcher as well as the ‘Anti-Felony Identification Device” (the below mentioned strips of confetti printed with the cartridge’s serial number), leading to a model that was not only safer to use but also escaped classification by that annoying overreaching tax office.

        Your typical “stun gun” isn’t a gun at all, and even though the term “stun gun” generally refers more to TASERS and their handgun-styled ergonomics, it’s thrown around to refer to any and all ECD/CEWs.

    1. I’m crazy, not stupid!
      The pain stops when the current does.
      Pepper-spray is the gift that keeps on giving.

      1. Heh. Commercial grade pepper spray is fun stuff.

        Of course it helps I’m a veteran of the U.S. Army infantry. Gas chamber (CS gas, geniuses!) day was a great day – cleared the hell out of my sinuses.

  2. “I got Tased and All I Got was This Lousy T-Shirt?”
    Panel 4: The disappointment is real.
    Sorry Fox. How about “I Volunteered to get Tased, but All I Got was This Lousy T-Shirt?”

    1. Nah, the shirt is cool. It just says “I Rode The Lightning” or “I took The Ride” or something like that.

  3. Maybe a change of underwear as well as a change of shirt. 😉

  4. I am enjoying the details on the background blackboard. “Do not use tasers to make toast!”

  5. Oh, I just noticed. Is the police officer a lieutenant? If he is, aren’t his bars placed wrong? I thought the lieutenant bars were placed vertically rather than horizontally. But, it could be different with that particular police department, I suppose.

    1. Good catch!

      Details of the uniform are intentionally vague/generic/incorrect. For safety and professional courtesy, I didn’t want to include markings that could identify this officer’s department. I Googled “police uniform,” picked out stuff I liked, and cobbled something together.

      The rank looked “better” horizontally on the narrower-than-usual collar I gave this guy, and since my goal was to be inauthentic, I rolled with it 😛

  6. Could always get certified. Last I checked, TASER certification involves getting a taste of the real thing similarly to a pepper spray cert. Surely there’s a Police Department, Sheriff’s Office, or private security firm offering the class if you’re that desperate to feel the burn.

  7. I don’t know whether to find it amusing or concerning that Fox was that excited to be tased.

  8. Easy enough, just stroll downtown, stand on the streetcorner shouting gibberish, maybe smash a window or two . . .
    oh, wait, that’s just politics now.
    Never mind.

  9. I don’t know how this idea got into my head, but…
    This is a perfect place for a Curtailed/MLP crossover. “Tase the Rainbow.”

  10. bahahah. don’t use tasers to make toast. DON’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO

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